I Wait, God does.

So my last post (about 2 months ago) was on this very topic.  I was really struggling with how to wait on the Lord.  I was completely preoccupied with finances for college tuition and ways to pay for the upcoming semester.  I'd been so busy doing, that I wasn't truly waiting to hear God's direction.  And God was about to slow me down and teach me.

Around the end of June I applied for a scholarship and had good reason to believe I would get it.  After about two weeks, I learned that others were getting money from this same scholarship and I had yet to hear anything.  I was happy for the other recipients but I was so disappointed for myself.  If I'm going to be truly honest, I was devastated.  I'd been turned down by so many other scholarships, but this rejection cut deep to my heart.  I was heading to work, crying, and knew I needed some time with the Lord.  I found an empty parking lot and just poured my heart out to God.  I hadn't cried like that in quite some time.  I spent about 40 minutes in my car going through the gamut of emotions:  hurt, anger, confusion, fear, worry, and bitterness. 

I remember saying out loud, "God, I can't take anymore, I can't do anymore. Enough is enough."  And in a split second He replied, "But Cheryl, I Am Enough." 

And that was it.  I realized that all my actions and plans were dependent on my own strength and my own wisdom.  I hadn't waited on God, His plan, His timing, or His wisdom at all.  I thought I was, but I wasn't.  And now I understood why all my plans kept falling through and why all my hard work was showing such little dividends.  I had forgotten that God is enough; He is all I will ever need, no matter what situation arises in my life.  I spent the next few minutes repenting:  repenting of my pride, my selfishness, my lack of faith, my worry, and my loss of perspective.  God's Word says that if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive our sins and cleanse from all unrighteousness (1John 1:9).  I am so grateful for that.  There is nothing like the feeling of forgiveness and being handed a clean slate from my Heavenly Father.  What a blessing!  After some more time in prayer, asking God to guide and direct and commiting myself to His wise leading, I was able to wait and rest in Him completely.  I no longer felt the need to get busy and do something about my situation.  I knew I could and should trust God to work things out in His way, in His timing.  I knew without a doubt that God wanted me in school, so I knew He'd find a way to pay for it.

So as this last month has passed, I just kind of forgot about the scholarship and tuition costs and did only those things that God directed me to do regarding my finances.  I had saved enough money to purchase 5 of the 10 books needed for the start of the term.  I don't need the other 5 until mid-October.  I continued doing things that are saving me money, but now I have the right focus and perspective about it.  It is no longer that all-consuming obsession that centers around me.  I made some other changes in regards to money as well.  I have always left the tithes/offering up to my husband, even though I had my own paycheck that I put into my own account just for school, but I have never tithed myself.  So with God's leading and Jerry's blessing, I began tithing from my own, albeit small, wages.  And you know what, Malachi 3:10 played out right in front of my eyes.  God opened the windows of Heaven and poured out His blessing.  Here's how:  that scholarship I thought I wasn't getting....I got it!  I just found out a few days ago.  Not only will it pay for the rest of my books for this semester, it will pay for all my books for next semester and I will still have some to put towards tuition cost.  When I got the news, all I could do was cry; this time tears of deep gratitude and deep appreciation.  God had proved Himself true and faithful and I am so very grateful....more grateful than words can ever express. 

So I learned....wait for the Lord.  He will do the rest.   "Therefore, I will look unto the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation; my God will hear me."  Micah 7:7    

       

Wait! Do! Wait! Do! I don't know!!!!

But as for me, I will wait expectantly for the Lord, I will watch for the God of my salvation; my God will hear me.  Micah 7:7

They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary and they shall run and not faint.  Is 40:31

I love these verses.  They are filled with encouragement and promises from God.  But as I read them, and a few other verses about waiting on the Lord, I have some questions too.  Like...how long do I wait?  What do I do while I wait?  When do I move into action?  Is any of my action inhibiting God's work?  Obviously, I'm not good at waiting.  I'm an action kind of person, especially when there is a problem and I see a way to resolve it.  And that's where I'm struggling with this whole waiting thing.  I have a problem....okay not a super huge problem...more of a concern really.  But for me, this is new territory and I'm not sure how to work through it. 

First, I want to praise You Lord for your many blessings.  You have more than provided for me in every area of my life, and I know You can provide for this too.  Forgive my lack of faith as I seek answers and solutions on my own.  I want to wait for You.  I truly want Your will to be done and accomplished in me.  Teach me to wait.  Amen.

So here's the struggle.....I know without a doubt, that God has led me through my education.  I am where He wants me, studying and preparing as He leads.  This next phase of my education that begins in August is the challenge.  It's expensive and honestly, we don't have it.  In addition, some other expenses have come up that are equally, if not more important, than the cost of my tuition.  I've applied for some scholarships....the do part.  Now the wait begins for the replies....actually I'v already gotten some no responses....seems being 18 and fresh out of high school has it's advantages.  So now I wait.....waiting for God to show me where all these finances are going to come from.  But as I wait, should I be doing anything?  I have started using coupons.  I'm putting the money I save into the bank.  I've started turning in all our pop cans and putting that money in the bank as well....it's not a lot, but it's a start.  Is this the answer from God I've been waiting for? Or am I so busy doing that it's hindering any future blessing God might have for me if I just wait a little longer.

What to do?  I don't know!!  Lord, help me!! 

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding.  In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy steps.  Prov 3:5-6

I've got The Power

So I love those AHA! moments, especially when it comes in the area of my spiritual growth and relationship with God.  Today, I had one of those moments during my personal time with God and as I've pondered it throughout the day, I'm excited to watch God use it in my life. 

The last few weeks I've been memorizing Romans 8:28-29 -  And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.  For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren.

I've also memorized Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the thoughts that I think towards you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you an expected end. 

These verses are from the Women's Bible study at church.  They are very powerful verses, especially when facing difficult circumstances in life.  God has a purpose and plan for everything that happens--good and bad.  God knows exactly what He is doing and how He is going to accomplish it.  And I know that all I need to do is trust Him completely.  I've seen Him do some pretty amazing things over the last few weeks, especially in the lives of some wonderful women who I have the privilege of knowing and calling friends.  When you see God working in others, it is encouragement and verification that He will work in me.  He will work out all things for His good according to His purpose.  He will work peace and hope into my future.  He will use all things to conform me to the image of His Son, my Savior, Jesus Christ. 

Then this morning I read Ephesians 1:15-21, but it was verses 19 & 20 that just jumped off the page at me:  and what is the surpassing greatness of his power toward us who believe.  These are in accordance with the working of the strength of His might which He brought about in Christ, when He raised Him from the dead and seated Him at His right hand in the heavenly places.

The power and might that God used to raise Christ from the dead is the same power He will use to work in me.  That kind of strength is available to me, for me, for my family....AHA!!!   Boy that adds a new layer to my ever-growing trust in my Heavenly Father.  It has been an awesome realization as I consider the realm of possibilities and let this truth sink into my head and my heart.

To be honest, it's somewhat boggling to my mind.  It's okay though because I know my mind boggles easy.  I'm just grateful God is interested in unboggling it and thanks to today's devotion, I've learned He's got the power to do it.....He's gonna need it. :)

It's okay to cry

Two weeks ago, I started a new Bible study.  I can say for a certainty that it will be one of those studies that will stay with me forever.  I've learned so many new things about God and about my relationship with Him.  God is growing me in ways that are exciting, challenging, and scary, all the while training me to keep my thoughts totally focused on Him.  And true to form, God is giving me opportunities to put into practice what I've been learning.  I so want to be faithful and take these opportunities to be obedient, but honestly, all I want to do is cry right now....not a self-pity, why me kind of cry, but a let it all out cry.  Is that okay? 
I'm not looking to run away or hide from anything. But I do think I'm feeling overwhelmed.  It can be overwhelming not understanding everything God is doing.  Walking by faith isn't always easy and it isn't always fun.  I wouldn't mind a little sight every now and then. 

I'd like to see how I'm suppose to handle my huge homework load this semester. I'm struggling with it.  And if God could just show me where the finances to pay for this education are going to come from, I'd be okay with that too.  I'd like to see the blueprint for my children's & grandchildren's future.  I'd like to take a peak at God's plan for a dear friend's health struggle.  My eyes would treasure a glance at the next phase for my sister in law as she approaches the one-year mark of her husband's murder.  And oh how I'd love to look at God's checklist for my husband as he deals with multiple sclerosis. 

But God reminds me that as I trust in Him, as I walk by faith, He will reveal to me the things I need to know.  I'm also reminded of Psalm 121, a psalm of help and reassurance.  As I read this psalm, I see God doing all the work, taking care of every situation.  All I have to do is look to Him, My Help.

 1 I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help.
 2 My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth.
 3 He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber.
 4 Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep.
 5 The LORD is thy keeper: the LORD is thy shade upon thy right hand.
 6 The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night.
 7 The LORD shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul.
 8 The LORD shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.

As I trust God, He will show His strength to me.  He will let me see His power.
Jer 33:3 Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.

So I do think it's okay to cry.  Scripture is full of people who cried.  Moses, Joshua, David, Hannah all cried unto the Lord as they faced difficult circumstances and sought His help and strength.  Their cries were cries of faith.  That's the kind of crying I want to do, with a heart of faith, pouring out my concerns to the One who will help, provide, strengthen, and comfort. 

So my tears now are those of gratitude.  And I have so much for which to be thankful.  I need a kleenex!


  

Golf & The Christian Life

Yay!!  It is so gorgeous outside and it makes me excited to get back to my new found love....Golf!  Yes, I love to golf.  Last year I took lessons and got totally hooked on the sport.  I practiced/played so much last year that I developed a really bad case of tendonitis in my left arm by the end of the summer.  It's all better now and I'm antsy to break out my clubs and dust off the rust from my swing, of which I'm sure there is quite a bit. 

But it made me think of how much rust needs to be dusted off of my Christian life, of which there is quite a bit as well.  Shouldn't I yearn to walk with God as much as I yearn to walk the golf course?  Shouldn't I practice the principles found in scripture as much as I practice my putting?  The answer, of course, is a resounding yes.  And I realized I can take lessons I learned in golf and apply them to my walk with the Lord, and vice versa. 

Truth #1:  Find a good instructor.  My golf instructor's name is Bud.  He is an older gentleman with the patience of a saint....and with me as a student, he sure needed it. Bud knows the game of golf and he knows how to teach it in a way that makes it fun, easy, and desirable to learn.  Bud took real pleasure in seeing me improve each week.  When I sank my first 10-yard putt in one try, he jumped in the air!  He has a love and enthusiasm for the game of golf that is contagious. So as Christians, we need to be in good churches that preach and teach Christ. I am so grateful for Westside Baptist Church.  This is a good
church! It's pastors are dedicated to serving God and ministering to other people.  They know the word of God and encourage every believer to know it too!  Their love for Christ overflows with tremendous joy. It is evident in everything they do and they want nothing more than to see the people of this church grow and succeed in the Lord and for the Lord. 

Truth #2:  Daily practice is required.  I couldn't rely on my two, 45-minute lessons a week to be the only time needed if I want to improve my golf game.  Bud made it very clear that I would never get better if I didn't go home and practice what he had taught me.  And believe me, it only took a few swings for Bud to know if I had been practicing or not.  I did practice a lot...tendonitis, remember.  But the practice wasn't always easy and improvement wasn't always quick.  There were days when I didn't want to practice, days I wanted to be doing something else or be somewhere else.  But each lesson as Bud would praise my efforts and improvements, it made the practice worthwhile.  And I enjoyed it more and more.  As a Christian, I need to be practicing my faith daily.  That means I must find it necessary to spend personal time with God every day.  I must read His word, memorize it, and apply it. I must daily spend time in prayer.  I do these things because of my desire to improve as a Christian and because I love Jesus above all else. I guarantee that a person who has a stagnant Christian life is not spending the time required with God to thrive.  Sunday morning for an hour just won't do it.  It's not enough practice for real improvement. 

Truth #3:  Practice produces results.  After several weeks of lessons, I could tee up without having to go through every little step.  My stance became second nature.  I no longer have to repeat in my head, "feet shoulder width apart, knees slightly bent, bend at the waist, align thumbs, angle of shaft."  I now can walk up to the tee, place my golf ball, and swing.  That's progress, a result of practicing.  That's exciting to me!  Is my swing perfect all the time?  No, but I know where I can and need to make adjustments.  Notice I did not say "Practice makes perfect".  I do not believe that.  I will never be the perfect golfer, no matter how much I practice.  And as good as he is, Tiger Woods is not a perfect golfer. I will never be the perfect Christian either, no matter how much I practice.  Only Jesus is Perfect!  But with practice, I can learn and grow and improve as a Christian.  I will continue to make mistakes.  The goal is to learn from them and to do my best the next time. Besides, I don't think God expects us to be perfect. He wants us trust, follow, and obey Him.  He will do the perfecting.  The results are in God's hands.

Truth #4:  Know the rules....they are there for a reason.
Truth #5:  Follow the rules....they keep you from all kinds of trouble.
Truth #6:  Being in the sandpit is a learning opportunity.
Truth #7:  Follow through is extremely important for balance.
Truth #8:  Be courteous to others on the course. 
Truth#9:  Take the penalty shot with grace and move on. 
Truth #10:  There is refreshment in the clubhouse.

Someday I may expand on these other truths, but for now, it's still nice outside and my golf clubs are calling!

This is not that!

This has been a good week for me, especially as I learn more about God and the truth of Who He is.  I have been preparing for the new Bible study that starts next week.  It is based on the book Loving God With All Your Mind by Elizabeth George.  It's been a challenging and exciting study that has pushed me in my relationship with my Heavenly Father.  As I've worked through the material, I've come to understand that I haven't always thought the truth about God.  For me, it was knowing the difference between the fact that God is faithful and that God is reliable.  They really are two very different aspects of His character. I had always focused on the faithfulness of God.  He is faithful to hear and answer my prayers.  He is faithful to provide for my needs.  His Word is true and faithful as I find comfort and strength in scripture.  I could go on about how God has been faithful and continues to be faithful, to me and to others. 

But God is also reliable.  It may seem like a small distinction, but for me, coming to this truth about God has been huge.  My parents divorced when I was in the 3rd grade and my father was an alcoholic. I could never rely on him for anything.  I couldn't count on him to be present at school functions.  And if he did show up, I couldn't trust that he would be sober. Weekends with him were full of broken promises and disappointments.  Even when I got married, he couldn't take the time to go get measured for his tuxedo.  He (or someone else, probably his wife) just called in the measurements and then complained when it didn't fit him properly.  I learned to have no expectations and placed little value in his words. 

Last week, I watched another DVD by Michelle McKinney.  She was talking about the relationship we have with our earthly father compared to the relationship we have with our Heavenly Father.  And she made this statement: This (my relationship with God) is not that (my relationship with my dad).  This is not that....this is not that....this is not that.....this is not that.....this is not that.  It echoed in my head.  Oh my word....my heart was breaking as I realized that I was, in small, quiet, unknowing ways, projecting my dad's unreliability onto God.  I hadn't fully been trusting God as I should because I wasn't seeing Him as reliable.  Even though I believe God is faithful, I haven't been fully depending on Him.  No wonder there are areas in my life where I struggle or situations that seem impossible.    

He has been lovingly and graciously proving to me His reliability.  I have had an ongoing dialogue with God about a certain situation and the proper way to approach it.  So yesterday in my prayer time I said to God, "Okay, I'm relying on You to show me the path and provide the plan.  I will not take matters into my own hands.  I will depend on You for this."  And wouldn't you know, today He gave the answer.  And it's a good one!  And He provided the means!  So I'm learning day by day to see Him as dependable.  I'm focusing on the truth of Who He is and not on my own thoughts or feelings. 

One simple phrase....."this is not that".......it's amazing the things God uses! 

God's Good Hands

I've been reminded this week, very often in fact, that I am in Good Hands.  No, not the insurance company's good hands.  God's Good Hands.  To be completely honest, God has been reminding me to leave things in His hands. And this last week I really haven't had a choice about it.  You see, my hands can't reach all the way to Florida.  And as wonderful as my husband is, his hands don't reach either.  Now that Bryson is on the other side of the country, I can only trust him into the loving, protective hands of my Heavenly Father.  I never realized before how much my hands were in the mix mixing things up.  But I love how God has used this exciting opportunity for Bryson to teach me a lesson on faith, trust, and relinquishing what little control I thought I had.  I do pray that Bryson learns this lesson too.

As Bryson left, we hugged and cried.  I told him how proud I was of him and how much I loved him.  I gave him a small Bible.  In it I highlighted some verses that he could turn to when he might be feeling discouraged, lonely, confused, or fearful.  As we hugged for the last time, I began to realize that my hands were not sufficient to see him through.  As he pulled out of the driveway, my hands waved good bye and seemed very empty.  But God gently spoke to my heart, reassuring me that Bryson was in the very best Hands possible! 
God's hands are sufficient to provide and protect.  And because I tend to be a slow learner, it's no surprise that the majority of verses in my devotions this week had to do with the power in God's hands.  I'll share a few of the verses and what I've learned.

Nevertheless I am continually with thee: thou hast holden me by my right hand - Psalm 73:23
God is always there.  Even if I'm not with Bryson, God is.  And He is holding both of our hands during this time, and He won't let go.

Thou openest thine hand, they are filled with good. - Psalm 104:28b
God is generous and only wants to give good to those who love Him.  He's not stingy and He will provide
the good things that Bryson needs.  I have a picture in my mind of God holding out all kinds of goodies for Bryson to choose from. And I can find good peace and good comfort because I know that God can give more good goodies than I ever could.

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way.  Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the Lord upholdeth him with his hand. - Psalm 37:23-24
Even when we stumble, God is there to catch us in His hands.  He will pick us up, dust us off, and put us back on the proper course.  His hands are strong enough!  And since God is there to catch us, that means that He is close to us. 

For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not: I will help thee. - Isaiah 41:13 
Well.....that kind of says it all now doesn't it.  I don't need to be afraid or worried about Bryson.  God is holding on to his hand and helping him.  What a wonderful, comforting promise. 

And God is helping me to grow in Him as I totally trust His hands to care not only for Bryson, but for me and my entire family.  God has the power in His hands to strengthen; the tenderness to comfort; the wisdom to guide; the patience to teach.  I truly am in Good Hands!

So what's the best thing I can do with my hands.....fold them in prayer and lift them in praise. 

Acknowledge God's Blessings

There is a really cute email going around right now about what happens in heaven when we pray.  It talks about angels being busy in the receiving department as all the numerous prayer requests come in.  Then it goes on to describe the angels being busy in the shipping & delivery department as God answers the prayers and bestows His blessings.  The final scene is one lone angel in the acknowledgement department, but he isn't busy at all.  It seems that no one has sent back an acknowledgment receipt of the blessings they've received.

Oh how often we take God blessings for granted. I know I do and it breaks my heart when I think about how often I forget to say a simple "Thank You" to my Lord.  He has given me everything I need and most of what I want.  The praise should be flowing from my mouth on a continual basis.  It should show in my actions and my attitudes as I go about my day. 

It is a good thing to give thanks unto the Lord, and to sing praises unto thy name, O Most High: to shew forth thy lovingkindness in the morning, and thy faithfulness every night.  Psalm 92:1-2

I recently had the sad experience of watching someone discount a huge blessing that had just been handed to them.  Instead of praising God, they chose to reject the goodness by displaying an unthankful attitude and a rude response.  It really was heartbreaking to witness.  I can't help but wonder how many blessings will now be withheld from this person.  How many hardships must they endure before they turn their heart back to the Lord and be thankful for everything that God has done for them.  A simple "Thank You" would have been sufficient.   A "Thank You Lord" would have been wonderful!  A declaration of God's goodness and provision would have been a powerful testimony to those watching. 

Psalm 135:3 Praise the LORD; for the LORD is good: sing praises unto his name; for it is pleasant.

I never want to discount God's goodness to me.  I want to be a woman who is filled with praises for my Lord.  I am challenged to speak and show my gratitude every single day.  Will you help me?  The next time we meet, let's share with each other at least one praise of how God has been good to us.  And you will have to start as I'm not sure who everyone is that reads this blog.  So just come up to me and say something like,
"God is so good.  He ___________ (fill in the blank)!  And I will rejoice with you and respond with a praise of my own.  If you don't live near me....send me an email....I will reply!!!

So here are my acknowledgement receipts for the blessings I've received.

Thank You Lord

Thank You for my salvation.  I am eternally grateful!

Thank You for being patient with me.  I learn slow.

Thank You for a loving husband, who is also patient with me.

Thank You for the blessings of children.  They are a great joy.

Thank you for the joy of grandchildren.  They are awesome.

Thank You for my mom and my sisters...Three of the best women I

I have the privilege of knowing and loving.

Thank You for providing me with a home, food and clothing.

Thank You for Your guidance in my schooling decisions. 

I will be calling on you soon for some more help.

Thank You for being there when I need you.

Thank You for safety when I drive.  You know I speed sometimes.

Thank You for my friends.  They are valuable treasures.

Thank You for Westside Baptist Church.  A much needed light in this community.

Thank You Lord....I love You!

Okay........that oughta keep that lone angel busy for a while!  

 



God is Present

Remember back in elementary school when awards were handed out at the end of the year.  It always seemed that the most applause was given to those students who received the "Perfect Attendance Award". 
And why not?  That's quite an accomplishment, never missing a day of school, always being there.  Well that's how it is with God.  He is always there.  He never misses a day.  God is personally present every day in my life.  I must sadly admit, however, that I am not always present with God, nor have I always acknowledged God's presence in my life.  But that's where God's patience and grace are so beautifully displayed as He's been teaching me from His Word.  And hopefully I have learned a lesson or two.

Lesson #1: God is with me....every hour of every day.  He is personally involved and active in my life.  He doesn't stand at a distance watching the events of my day unfold.  He is in the midst of everything I do.  Even when I feel He isn't there, He is!  It is my own faulty thinking &/or emotions that allow me to believe that God is not near.  But the fact is, He is present.  Psalm 139:1-10 says so.  I'm trying to memorize it.  But this passage of scripture says that God knows my downsitting and my uprising.  He is aquainted with all my ways.  He is before me and behind me.  Any place I go, He goes to.  And I love verse 10 "Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me."   Wherever I go, not only is God with me, but He is there to lead me and to hold me.  I find that very comforting, especially during the times in life when things aren't going quite so well. 

Here's my tendency concerning God's presence.  When things are tough, I mean really tough, I know God is there.  That's when I lean on Him the most.  That's when my trust and faith are at it's highest because I know that I can't get through without God by my side.  But when things are going well, especially well, that's when I tend to forget that God is with me.  Oh I still have my daily devotions and prayer, but I just go through my day with no thought of His personal presence.  How silly is that?  Some people are just the opposite though.  They recognize God's presence during the good times and feel He has left during the tough times.  They wonder where He is and why He's left them.  Equally silly.  God is there, all the time....which leads me to...

Lesson #2:  I need to acknowledge God's presence in my life.  I am learning that two things are needed to acknowledge God's presence:  Praise & Prayer.  By having an attitude of praise, I am showing His goodness in my life.  Public praise testifies to others how God is working personally in my life.  It shows that He is real and close and intimately involved in the affairs of my life.  Prayer also is a key way to say to God that you know He is with you.  1 Thess 5:17 says that we are to pray without ceasing.  To me that means keeping the lines of communication open with God all day.  I try to converse with God throughout my day.  Sometimes it's the big, important things of life like school/career decisions and sometimes it's the little stuff like feeling a cold coming on or having the right attitude as I do housework.  But whatever it is, I talk with Him because He is here with me and I want to acknowledge in presence.  It's like linking arms with God as we walk along together. 

I can honestly say that every time in my life when attendance was taken, God has never been marked absent.  He is always there.  Perfect Attendance!  My challenge is to do the same. 

One last thing....Some people say God is nowhere to be found.
I say...God is now here to be found.

God is Good

So I was all ready to sit down this morning and write about a particular struggle going on in my life.
Actually, it's been going on for awhile and I've never really been able to figure out why I haven't gotten
a handle on it.  Yes every time I started to write, it just wasn't what I wanted to say.  I couldn't get the words
to express the thoughts I wanted to share.  And then it hit me.....crash, bam...like a bolt of lightening!  I was leaving God out of the picture.  I needed to turn to Him first and get my priorities back in line.  So I left
my computer, picked up my Bible, my devotion book, and my reading glasses (a true necessity), and spent some quiet time with my Lord. 

I began reading about trusting God and trusting His word.  And if I was going to trust God, especially during a struggle, I needed to learn more about Him.  I learned that He will and does deliver His children from all, not just some, but ALL their afflictions (Ps 34:19 & Ps 72:12).  I learned that He is with me wherever I go (Josh 1:9), and that His grace is sufficient for all my needs (2 Cor 12:9). 

But another verse jumped out at me. 
Psalm 119:71 - It is good for me that I have been afflicted; that I might learn thy statutes. 

Hmmm....God says afflictions are good.  Really?  Good?  Yes!....good!  God even goes on to say why it's good for troubles to come....so I can learn His statutes...His law....His way!  And is there any better way than God's way?  And the answer is.......a resounding no!  God's way is always best.  I may not understand it at times.  But then I don't have to understand.  I am to walk by faith, not by sight.  I am to trust that God's ways are not my ways and that His thoughts are higher than my thoughts (Is 55:8-9).  I am to trust that He knows the beginning from the end and that all things will work together for the good to them that love God who are called, according to His purpose (Rom 8:28).  And there's that word good.....again. 

Now here's the amazing part of my day.  After I get done with my devotions and study, I stand up and immediately the phone rings.  It's someone from church telling me that there is a lady who is interested in Bible study.  I get her name, number, and a little background info.  Apparently, she is going through a trial.  So I pray first and then I give her a call.  She is a lovely woman but boy is she going through a trial.  She opens her heart and pours it out to me.  She has so many questions about why this is happening, what did she do wrong, how will she deal with it.  She is steadfast about her love for the Lord, but this is shaking her to the core and she needs help.  And here comes the amazing part.....I have the words to share with her.  Not my words, but God's words.  The very words I was just studying.  The very words that God used to speak to my heart, He was putting into my mouth to help her.  I shared with her the verses I listed above and a few others.  We talked about how God is in control of everything and that He always has a plan and a purpose for what happens in our life.  I kind of think God used this sweet lady to teach me as well.

I truly believe that if I had spent time this morning lamenting over my own struggles and living it up at my own pity party,  I would have missed out on some truly amazing blessings today.  God challenged me today to always keep my eyes on Him....first and foremost.  Only good will come when I do....and there's that word....good....again....Yes, my God is so good!!

God Restores

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.  Romans 8:28

The above verse is so true.  I have had the amazing privilege to see this verse in real live working action over the last year as God has taken tragedy and used it for good as He has restored and healed my husband's family. 

Let me set the stage.  I will take you back to April 28, 2010.  My husband's family is estranged, to say the least.  For well over 10 years there has been some kind of turmoil going on in this family.  I won't go into all the details because that really isn't the point.  The point is that relationships were severely broken and there were some very deep wounds.  And though many in the family were praying for healing, I believe that we were becoming reconciled to the fact that this was just the way the family was going to remain.  Birthdays, holidays, weddings, and anniversaries all came and went with little to no contact.  And when there was some form of communication, often it would lead to more hurt, which led to more seperation and division in the family.   My husband and I took on the attitude that we would just live our own lives.  Having a fragmented family was the "norm" and we made the best with the little bit of family that God had given us.  Little did we know that God wanted to give us everyone! 

So life on April 28, 2010, was fairly routine, nothing out of the ordinary.  Then the phone call came in the early morning hours of April 29, 2010.  My sister-in-law's (Char) husband (Jim) had been murdered in his home.  It was a horrible act of evil hurled upon this family.  But God's goodness and grace took over.  Over the days that followed, the entire family gathered together.  Restoration was taking place.  There was no need to rehash old arguements or open old wounds.  All the hurt and pain of the last decade fell away. Forgiveness was asked for in our tears and given in our hugs.  Priorities were put into perspective as we all looked to God for the comfort and strength that was so desperately needed. 

One amazing thing I learned during this time was how God had been working in the lives and hearts of this family during our time of division.  Jim and Char were strong Christians, active in their church and leading a Bible study in their home every week.  My husband's parents were part of the Bible study and loved learning more about God's Word.  Other family members who were Christians were regularly praying for the family.  My own relationship with God grew over the years as I desired to be more Christ-like in every area of my life.  So even though we may have spent some time divided, God kept us united through His love and His leading. 

So today is March 8, 2011.  Not quite a year has passed.  We just came home from a wonderful weekend in Washington with the family.  We celebrated the arrivals of four new babies born into the family over the last few months.  We celebrated as a family, restored and united.  I spent a lot of time yesterday looking at this family God has given back to us.  I am more grateful than words can ever express.  I am grateful that God never gives up on those who love Him.  I am grateful that God is patient.  I am grateful that God's plan is always best. God took one terrible, horrific night and used it to put His plan of restoration into motion.  He has turned tragedy into triumph and has worked this all out for good....His good.....He is Good!!!! 

My purpose for this blog

Okay, blogging doesn't seem to be quite as easy as I thought.  I've been reading other people's blogs over the past few days and have come to realize that most of them have a specific purpose.  Some blogs have no
rhyme or reason, and to be honest, those are the ones that are the least interesting.  The blogs that have
a focused theme are the ones that I am drawn to the most.

So I began to deliberate about my blogs purpose.  Then I thought about my purpose and what should be the focus and center of my life, and the answer was clear......Jesus! 

So this blog will be about my growing faith as a Christian.  I will share the things I'm learning from God's Word, from preaching & teaching in Church, and from others in my life.  And I look forward to learning and growing from other bloggers who share the same interests as well.  My greatest desire would be for this blog to glorify God, edify and encourage others, and share the love of God with those who need it.

Just getting started

So, I'm not real sure what to write about.  Besides, it is 1:20 in the morning and I have to be up in about 5 hours and teach Women's Bible study at 10am.  The Bible study has been really good this year.  We have been going through the book of Luke and studying the life of Christ.  I have really learned a lot about the
deep compassion and love that Jesus has for people.  He never turned anyone away.  No matter how busy or tired, Jesus always took the time to meet the needs of those around Him.  What a challenge to my heart for sure!  There are people all around who need some love, time, and attention.  And I can do that.  But the bigger question is....will I do that?  I hope so.  I try.  I strive to be more Christ-like in my actions and attitudes....but there is always room for improvement.